Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Memo puts WGN news staffers at a loss for words | Feder | blogs.vocalo.org
Memo puts WGN news staffers at a loss for words Feder blogs.vocalo.org
Tribune Company CEO Randy Michaels has proclaimed the following 119 words cannot be spoken on the Chicago Tribune WGN Radio Station.
■“Flee” meaning “run away”
■“Good” or “bad” news
■“Laud” meaning “praise”
■“Seek” meaning “look for”
■“Some” meaning “about”
■“Two to one margin” . . . “Two to one” is a ratio, not a margin. A margin is measured in points. It’s not a ratio.
■“Yesterday” in a lead sentence
■“Youth” meaning “child”
■5 a.m. in the morning
■After the break
■After these commercial messages
■Aftermath
■All of you
■Allegations
■Alleged
■Area residents
■As expected
■At risk
■At this point in time
■Authorities
■Auto accident
■Bare naked
■Behind bars
■Behind closed doors
■Behind the podium (you mean lecturn) [sic]
■Best kept secret
■Campaign trail
■Clash with police
■Close proximity
■Complete surprise
■Completely destroyed, completely abolished, completely finished or any other completely redundant use
■Death toll
■Definitely possible
■Diva
■Down in (location)
■Down there
■Dubbaya when you mean double you
■Everybody (when referring to the audience)
■Eye Rack or Eye Ran
■False pretenses
■Famed
■Fatal death
■Fled on foot
■Folks
■Giving 110%
■Going forward
■Gunman, especially lone gunman
■Guys
■Hunnert when you mean hundred
■Icon
■In a surprise move
■In harm’s way
■In other news
■In the wake of (unless it’s a boating story)
■Incarcerated
■Informed sources say . . .
■Killing spree
■Legendary
■Lend a helping hand
■Literally
■Lucky to be alive
■Manhunt
■Marred
■Medical hospital
■Mother of all (anything)
■Motorist
■Mute point. (It’s moot point, but don’t say that either)
■Near miss
■No brainer
■Officials
■Our top story tonight
■Out in (location)
■Out there
■Over in
■Pedestrian
■Perfect storm
■Perished
■Perpetrator
■Plagued
■Really
■Reeling
■Reportedly
■Seek
■Senseless murder
■Shots rang out
■Shower activity
■Sketchy details
■Some (meaning about)
■Some of you
■Sources say . . .
■Speaking out
■Stay tuned
■The fact of the matter
■Those of you
■Thus
■Time for a break
■To be fair
■Torrential rain
■Touch base
■Under fire
■Under siege
■Underwent surgery
■Undisclosed
■Undocumented alien
■Unrest
■Untimely death
■Up in (location)
■Up there
■Utilize (you mean use)
■Vehicle
■We’ll be right back
■Welcome back
■Welcome back everybody
■We’ll be back
■Went terribly wrong
■We’re back
■White stuff
■World class
■You folks
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3 comments:
He forgot "gone missing".
Randy Michael's brain has gone missing.
Yesterday, Randy Michael's brain disappeared.
Randy Michael's famed brain, in a surprise move, has literally suffered an untimely death.
Sources say that Randy Michael's brain perished in clash with police. Authorities allege that the Tribune Company is now at risk for increased profitability going forward.
After giving 110% effort to the bankrupted Tribune Company, Randy Michael's world-class brain underwent surgery up in there; however, it went terribly wrong and all of his cerebral white stuff reportedly ended up over in the medical hospital's dumpster. Details are sketchy. We'll be right back.
Officials say that Randy Michael's brain was arrested on charges of being an undocumented alien, but not before it attempted to flee in a vehicle to an undisclosed location. A manhunt ensued, and police later caught up to the brain down in SFV. Authorities say that it's lucky to be alive and parole is definitely possible.
Randy Michael's brain hit the campaign trail yesterday to lend a hand as Sarah Palin's personal assistant. The brain was later fired by Palin personally for incompetence.
In thinking like an owner, why do you need a VP of Operations if you have only one printing facility? Nothing personel, just looking for ways to increase my 401.
1%... There are two printing plants. I remember Newton asking me if it was the long drive that was getting me upset (when they closed the Valley), I said no-- it was the extra time spent away from my family. Then he said the "hungry" printers working out of Irwindale drive twicw as far for 1/2 the pay. You guys make too much money for the job you do.
How much does he make for nary an original thought as the "Senior" VP of Operations. Indeed, as an owner, I too would like to lop off that waste of dough.
Too bad we couldn't get the Irwindale people into the Union. It could've been a way to save more money-- some how.
Where's your next vacation?
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