Easy Writer Firmly Ensconced In Middle Age(FULLERTON CA) In honor of her birthday, the Queen has made the following decrees:
1. The stuff around the mid section of older people is NOT fat. It is EXTRA SKIN.
2. It's a proven fact that most people do not eat while reading the LA Times. Therefore, it may be deduced that reading the LA Times will help you lose weight.
3. In order to boost subscriptions and prove our policy of inclusiveness, a support group is being formed by the Pressmen for "people who eat while they're reading."
4. It is better to be middle-aged and naive, than young and stupid.
5. Ed Padgett's Mercedes is hereby dubbed "the bling mobile."
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