"When I meet others who also didn't grow up here, sometimes we compare notes. The most common complaints are:
1. People who grow up here don't have any manners. Stay here long enough, you find yourself fighting to keep your own.
Now, if you grew up here, you might now understand what we're talking about. It's not that you don't have them, you just didn't live under the tight knit reign we did. One friend grew up in an area where elders were addressed as "sir" or "ma'am." We offered our seats on the bus to the elderly, opened doors for others and said hello to perfect strangers as we passed by."
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Sunday, June 15, 2008
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2 comments:
So eloquently written, Kanani. I'm prayerful that your post will turn a light on for others.
Nubia
I've lived here on and off since 1978. Even since that time, I've seen changes that are extreme. They're not necessarily confined to L.A. but how our society has shifted values to ones that are more consumer-based than either ethical or spiritual.
I think one change that has to happen is in the way we make make requests. It's been observed that by and large, we've become lazy.
What I notice is that when people need help, or want something done, they say, "Can you..." "Would you..." "Do you want..." A fight ensues when the person being asked says no and more time is spent on the fight than getting the task done.
If something needs to be done, give a directive, "I need you to... " and just lay it out. It opens the door for more explanation or even compromise if needed, but usually if you say it with both intent and consideration, things will get done!
What I really hate are parents who act like kids. To wit: the father who had a major coronary, then laughs as he downs huge portions of verboten food as his weight continues to go up. Later, he blames our healthcare system for his health issues.
Ugh... those people.... really, I can do without.
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